Edges and Corners

This week's quote reads, "Celebrate your edges and corners. Diamonds aren't round either."

This is a call to celebrate human diversity, our own individuality, in a world where uniformity, following the crowd, fitting in, seems to be prized above almost anything else.  We live in an age where being different, or dissenting from the views of the majority, invites censure rather than praise, more often than not. 

Yet fitting in is not the same as true belonging. Brené Brown explains the difference beautifully in her book, The Gits of Imperfection. She writes, "When we can let go of what other people think and own our story, we gain access to our own worthiness - the feeling that we are enough just as we are and that we are worthy of love and belonging. When we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don't fit with who we think we're supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving. Our sense of worthiness - that critically important pieces that gives us access to love and belonging - lives inside of our story."

It takes courage to live authentically, with our edges and corners on show. The temptation to soften, blunt those edges and corners can be strong, as we strive to find a place in the world where we belong. Because being the odd one out, the one who doesn't "fit", hurts. It hurts a lot. People can be very cruel if our difference is on display. I know that in a small way from a childhood spent wearing patched glasses, and so a recipient of taunts in the playground. I was always chosen last for any games team, because my defective eyesight meant I "lost" the ball coming towards me. Many people have suffered, and continue to suffer, far worse than this, on account of their sexuality, the colour of their skin, their neurodivergence, to name but a few areas of "difference".

But like Brené says, "when we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don't fit with who we think we're supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and hustle for our worthiness."

Yet human diversity is a gift, not a curse. Or it should be. Somewhere out there, there are people whose edges and corners fit with ours, who have come to terms with their own edges and corners.  When we find them, they allow the diamonds that we are to shine brightly.