Choosing Your Words Carefully

This week's quotation, by Julius Stinde, wins my personal prize of the month for an unusual simile. "A good deed is like lavender, which, as you know, smells lifelong."

I understand what he means, but such an odd way of putting it. My mind tried to find a connection between good deeds and lavender, and went on strike. Maybe it's just me...

But it made me think about my own writing. Regular readers will know that in my down time, I write novels. My first, One Foot in Front of the Other,  is going to be published on 1st October, which is very exciting! And I'm currently working on the first volume of a fantasy, set in a fictional world where magic and religion intertwine in what I hope is an interesting way. My son is my first reader, and when he sends each chapter back to me, it is full of insightful comments, which have helped enormously.

Most useful of all have been the comments "I don't understand..." or "Why?" Because that shows me that I haven't explained what is happening well enough, or not set up a situation properly. So I go back to the manuscript and revise it gratefully.

Words have power. They can paint a picture in a reader's or listener's mind, influence them for good or ill, even rush off and change their lives. So it is vital that we who make our livings through words are careful about what we write, what we share. And I don't mean only authors of fiction, I also mean journalists, non-fiction writers, storytellers, teachers, lecturers, even ministers. We need to always bear in mind the influence that our words might have on the reader or listener.

This is also true in conversation, for everyone. And doubly true when posting on social media. The saying I learned in the playground, "Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words can never hurt me" is the most inaccurate maxim I have ever heard. Bones mend, bruises heal, but harsh words, teasing words, belittling words, words filled with hate, can leave scars that never heal. They have a real and very evil power. Even when the person saying them thinks they are doing it in jest.

Another saying from my childhood, often quoted by my mother, was, "If you can't think of anything nice to say, don't say anything." I've often seen a quote about right speech, "If you propose to speak, always ask yourself, is it true, is it necessary, is it kind?" attributed to the Buddha, so I googled it just now, and found a fascinating article on a blog called Fake Buddha Quotes. The author gave a genuine quote, translated from the Vaca Sutta, written in Pali, by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, which is even better, if not as snappy, as the fake quote:

"Monks, a statement endowed with five factors is well-spoken, not ill-spoken. It is blameless and unfaulted by knowledgeable people. Which five?

• It is spoken at the right time. 
• It is spoken in truth. 
• It is spoken affectionately. 
• It is spoken beneficially. 
• It is spoken with a mind of goodwill."

Such words are a power for good.