Be Gentle

 I have written about being kind and gentle often in this blog, but I feel the need to revisit this topic, after the defeat of the England football team in the UEFA Cup on Sunday evening. Even the least football-conscious among us must have caught a sense of the high hopes riding on that game. A lot of people will be feeling bitterly disappointed, because the team didn't win.

(Max Pixel)

Two of the fruits of the Spirit mentioned in Paul's Letter to the Galatians are kindness and gentleness. But when people are bitterly disappointed, it is often the automatic reaction to lash out at anyone they may feel is to blame. Sadly, as I expected, our social media feeds and newspapers the last couple of days have been filled with quick and judgemental (not to mention downright racist) reactions. The England team, who have been the media's darlings over the last few weeks, are now their scapegoats.

So fickle. So very, very unfair. 

But there have been messages of support and kindness too, which is good.

I love the reminder given by the anonymous poet, "Be gentle with one another... /  Who of us can look inside another and know / What there is of hope and hurt, or promise and pain? / Who can know from what far places each has come / Or to what far places each may hope to go."

We can't... but it is so very easy to judge others by what we see and hear and read on the surface. The poet further tells us to "Handle with exceeding, tender care, for there are / Human beings, there within / Human beings, vulnerable as we are vulnerable / Who feel as we feel, / Who hurt as we hurt."

Earlier on Sunday, I watched the Wimbledon Men's Singles Final, between previous winner, the Serbian player, Novak Djokovic, and the young Italian player, Matteo Berrettini. And it became very clear, early on in the match, that the Centre Court crowd were rooting for Berrettini. There was chanting, "Matt-e-o, Matt-e-o" and each time the young Italian won a point, the applause was rapturous.

Which was okay. But it was not okay that they applauded when Djokovic made an error. I wasn't surprise to notice that it began to get to Djokovic. It must be so hard to play your best, knowing that the audience is rooting for the other guy. Even though off court, the two men are friends and often play together. 

The Wimbledon crowd had evidently not heard the words I just quoted, about the vulnerability of each human being. They were partisan and didn't care who knew it. And it did feel unkind, not gentle or considerate at all.

Why do we do this to each other? What can't we all just get along? Each of us is a sentient human being, with the power of choice. And our choices have the power to dictate how we react to other human beings, to incidents in our lives and in the lives of others.

So let us be gentle with one another in the coming days and weeks. May we remember that each person we meet is a vulnerable human being, each with their own preoccupations, hopes, dreams and fears, and try to respond with kindness and gentleness in every encounter that we have with others.